Dear Amanda & Heath
my heartfelt congratulations to you both your about to become one of the greatest little units in creation, a family!
This card reflects that sentiment beautifully, and im moved also to the point of poetry.
Please accept - and excuse - my humble offering, which although not quite poignant is certainly rather pungent,
and thus hopefully memorable.

Excuse me for leaping ahead a bit dears, but im only just keeping up with things here. I loved your engagement, you’ll both make good stock, but your latest arrangement - well im pleasantly shocked! If i wasnt perverted and wrote to you faster, I could have averted communication disaster. But lets look ahead - yes thats you quite soon now aint life a bed of roses in bloom! I know im facetious, and just having fun yet i’ll be almost speechless if you have a young son. But thats got me thinking, something tells me i ought’er ‘cause ive got a faint inkling you might have a daughter! Whatever the gender, it dont really matter, there’s no R.T. Sender, once you hear “pitter patter” Little feet, little smiles, little hearts to warm you through, little pongs that smell for miles, when little nappies are full of poo!

Ha Ha, and on that gently frivolous faux pas about fundamental family functions, i shall rest my overworked
excuse for a brain and reiterate my genuine warmth, love and affection for you both and the one to be,
the child star we all once were, training for the adult role we all must play.
Role models arent always thick on the ground, but i know you two well enough to anticipate nothing but
the best for yourselves and your baby.

Aroha Mui
Frank

June 04